i'm nauseous but ill try not to let it ruin my high i'll bet his bed is warmer than mine i'll bet his hands hands work faster than mine i had a dream i wanted to kiss your sad face in the black lodge i was dressed nice you were casual at best now i'm throwing up in someones bathroom i barely know and i'm wasted even when i'm not wasted i'm always wasted in the dark parts of my mind i see that you are tied and i'm making you love when you don't love me you can leave if you want ------- cuties in far off places like me in my short shorts drinking root beer and feeling alone i'll matter for a month then you'll hate me i'm not enough to be special you'll just hate me and get annoyed throwing up in front of cops i'm already hurting myself when i'm lucky to be liked at all but i'm so selfish i'll ask for more and when i cant get it there's none at all friends until tundra skeletons dressed in high fashion ------ killed the drinks where we were and then we touch i said something then i said "spirit." i feel my body kick me out accepting process i wont tread signal. ------- i saw you and i couldn't speak fill with black and i cave in into my impulsive ness dawn my flag my mourning garb don't feel don't feel that i own you don't feel i can feel whole but that's alright and i scoff "life's not fair" -------- immortality cover me in honey my place in heaven is a mirage oh i'm having a wonderful time ---------- i'm not so concerned i just want something to drink dull sense from sweet dull dull dull dull dull dull dull dull i don't know how to reach you i don't matter i don't know ---------- i first stat in earthy format feeling slower distance me don't leave with my terror wont take anything with me i wont need it will i ? what will it take when will i have had enough whats enough ---------- you say you're blessed and i'm blessed and secrets become your teeth structure looming fiend i drink the tea from your dreams imperiously and mouthiously i come back -------------- taken humans are vampires decomposing evil has the forms allegory of unrest watch yer demons eat yer gods devil in the hungry cold fortified with heavy gold and i convert to folly ----------------

into the night i walk in temper i've got my tolerance wrapped around nothing kept in my lower left in a fantastic body my patience's hungry overfed with terror trembling and anxious wreck in a fantastic body there's nothing left around me ambition'd be a miracle only whats inside of me confined to this holding cell ---------------------------------- remember when you'd tell me you would fucking leave me if i wouldn't play my part slap me in your mattress keep things from ending order for just one more time well hold back your wasteful little heart your weightless fucking heart remember when id tell you i could never please you because my broken parts love is not forever and conditions make it weaker it's a desert and your thirsty hide well hold back your complaining thoughts your claims your compelling response does love need hands ? ------------ i don't want to sleep anymore shape of the ascension cleanliness of thought, you rot no one's seen the angels fall down in the dark, you rot blessed are the weak, for what their not no one's seen the angels ----------- right before you leaved i told myself i'd leave i do not deserve what i want i do not deserve what i need one more time for me how do you measure a year and not feel like it's all over i'm just over dramatic --------------- yer venom creeps amongst me (your voice silent but heavy) ???? (guarded intention) you won't speak what you're thinking ????? (do you really see me ?) i am nothing you won't be (???? ???) you won't speak what you're thinking yer venom creeps amongst me --------------------------------- animals could shadow me in their fears of death and surely all their wants and motives from all sides we're different enough no one cares about anything but themselves to escape the vicious tides of friendship feigned and disregard what you made i want no part by accepting them i've been erased. --------------------------------------- the same never changing cold mechanical voice speak on the bus a single file pilgrimage of red lights homeward extends to the farthest reach of the vantage from the seat in the center the unfamiliar parts of the valley rarely touched by my eyes the small world i live in expands slowly in my a certain nausea from my over coated body low in my neck and the wooziness from down to the stomach the small world i live in expands slowly ------- white truck oldies ring but easy the sunset purple vibrations do you feel me did i imagine discover ghastly self in the little isolations three trees and a little stream, and a hot cowboy sun and a cow carcass being eaten i almost immediately forgot how to get there i remember the flies my memories got scattered by dream files whats never happened can easily be just as real Vietnam dream scared me silly i'm not at war what are you waiting for ? we're all dying ------------------------------------------ you use your words like you want decaying admiration i'll just fuck off know its not enough ------------------------------ (instrumental)